The Cheever Letters

"The Cheever Letters" is the forty-eighth episode of the American sitcom Seinfeld, the 8th episode of season four. Written by Larry David, Elaine Pope & Tom Leopold and directed by Tom Cherones, it premiered on October 28, 1992.

Plot

George is to meet Susan's parents (played by Warren Frost and Grace Zabriskie) and is not looking forward to telling her father that his cabin had been burned down (by Kramer with the Cuban cigars Susan's father had given to George as a gift). Jerry suggests that the Rosses are likely to see the irony of the situation.

The two of them try to settle down to get some work on their pilot script done. They struggle to get some work done, and Jerry decides to phone Elaine. He gets through to her chatty secretary Sandra (Lisa Malkiewicz). Jerry complains to Elaine about Sandra, and after getting off the phone she asks her secretary to not talk to Jerry so much. Sandra is not happy, and quits. Meanwhile, back at the apartment Kramer enters, and asks George if he has any more Cuban cigars as he needs them to play golf in a private club. George does not, so he leaves with a mission to find some.

That night, George has an awkward dinner with Susan and her parents. Susan eventually tells her father that the cabin was burnt down, and he is devastated to discover that there was nothing recovered. Meanwhile, Jerry is asked by Elaine to apologize to Sandra in the hope that she might return to work. Jerry does so, and is persuaded to arrange a date with her that night. They end up back at the apartment later that night but she storms off after they had been talking dirty and Jerry had crossed the line.

Jerry meets George the next day in the café and explains what had happened the previous night. Jerry explains how he said, "You mean the panties your mother laid out for you?", and this led to Sandra storming out. George tells Jerry about dinner the night before, and they return to the apartment to work on the pilot. They doze off but are awoken by Elaine who thanks Jerry for getting Sandra back to work there. Jerry says she should relocate her quickly, and is relieved she had not mentioned the previous night.

Kramer heads to the Cuban Diplomatic Mission at the United Nations to get hold of some cigars and meets three Cuban diplomats who, although they have some, tell him that they are illegal in the United States. However, the chief diplomat, played by Miguel Perez, likes Kramer's jacket, and they come to an agreement to swap.

Jerry and George go to Susan's house to return her sunglasses. While they are there a doorman comes round with a metal box from the insurance company, the only thing to survive from the fire. Susan opens it, and discovers inside some letters written to her father from the novelist John Cheever. She reads a letter, detailing Susan's father's affair with Cheever. After a brief pause, Jerry and George attempt to leave but Susan's father enters the room. He notices the box, and the reaction of the people in the room makes him fear the worst. He is found out to be bisexual and describes Cheever as "the most wonderful person" he'd ever known and that he "loved him deeply" in a way they "would never understand." Jerry and George finally leave the shocked family.

Back home, they attempt to do some more work on the pilot. They manage one more sentence (Jerry: "I could say, 'How's it going?'!") before they get interrupted by Elaine. She is not happy. Having gotten Sandra transferred to another department, her ex-secretary had told everybody that Elaine had been using company funds to phone a friend in Europe. The company has charged her $429, which Jerry pays for her. Hearing some commotion outside, Jerry opens the door to his apartment to reveal Kramer and the three Cuban diplomats, who go off to play golf. One of them is wearing Kramer's jacket. Inside, George is reading Falconer by John Cheever, and Jerry tells Elaine that he is "familiar with some of his writings". Jerry sends Elaine away so they can get some work done. As she leaves, she reveals that Sandra had told her about her night with Jerry, saying, "Maybe I should go visit my mother. She just bought me some new panties and they’re all laid out for me!"